There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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