and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
