why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
