'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
