I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
they're like a gay fantastic four
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
