4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Randomize
