She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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