I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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