lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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