This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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