Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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