i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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