dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
