I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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