I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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