This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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