Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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