Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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