Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
