you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize