i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
