just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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