would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We're not piercing ourselves today.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
