Whod you bang
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Randomize
