I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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