Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
