actually, I'm a sock model
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
