I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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