It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
