can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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