If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
