margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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