This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
