IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Sober January is a disaster.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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