He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Terrible idea I love it
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
