How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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