I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
