glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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