Where did you get a picture of my penis
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize