I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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