I want to walk on stilts...naked
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize