no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I need moral support for this bender
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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