if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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