I think I just saw someone hide a body.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
