dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
he told me I talked like a deaf person
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize