So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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