your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
