Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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