that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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