i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
