i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so let's talk penis.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
