Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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